I've thrown a few parties here and there, and as any gracious hostess knows, it's your job to make your guest feel right at home. Good music, food, entertainment, yadda yadda yadda. There are myriads of books on how to throw a perfect party. However, not many people know what it means to be a good party guest.
Our past two parties really nailed it home for me and inspired today's post. Each one of these scenarios happened, and I'm trying to prevent Angry Hostess from happening to you.
1. Please, please, please, please RSVP. Especially if it says RSVP. Especially if it has an RSVP date. Especially if they leave a phone number and an email. I don't care if it's movie night with the girls or a 3 day wedding extravaganza, you RSVP. That's your job, not the host/ess's to have to follow up because you were too busy. What do you think they are doing? Think of the effort to make and send you an invite...you can take 30 seconds out of your day to make contact. Can you believe some of our guests never RSVP'd at all?
2. If you do get a call/email, for pity's sake, a. respond back. I emailed a few friends who didn't email back. b. NEVER tell the host/ess you lost the invite. Say something like "Oh, I don't have it in front of me, refresh my memory on the time?" Think of the effort to make and send you an invite...PUT IT SOMEWHERE IMPORTANT! Can you believe some guests LOST our box soccer invite?
3. If you do RSVP and your plans change, please, please, please let your host/ess know ASAP. And I don't mean 10 minutes before the party. Yes, it happened. I know that kids get sick, you forgot your in-laws are coming in that day, etc. etc. Never let people prepare for you and you don't show up, then call the next day with some lame excuse. Yes, that happened too.
4. Never call right before a party asking for directions. There is nothing a host/ess loves more than rushing around trying to remember last minute stuff and has to stop and give you directions. That is why they invented Mapquest.
5. A good guest NEVER shows up 30 minutes early unless you are part of the work crew. There is nothing a host/ess loves more than rushing around trying to remember last minute stuff and feeling obligated to entertain you by engaging in a convo. Not cool.
6. If you are running late/get lost/ have an emergency, call the host/ess to inform. Please don’t keep the party waiting without any word from you. I had one of our guests call to let me know she was one her way but running a little late...good guest indeed!
7. Mingle, mingle, mingle. A good host/ess senses a lull and will swoop in. But if she has children clawing at her leg or her pot roast is on fire, she's a bit distracted. Don't be a wallflower.
8. ALWAYS offer to help. It's nice, and if you are like me, with 17 irons in the fire, you will need all the help you can get. Plus, it will be a paysie-backsie at your party. If she says no, go elsewhere. Don't hover. There is nothing a host/ess loves more than rushing around trying to remember stuff and feeling obligated to entertain you because you are hanging over her. Refer to #7.
9. Leave it the way you found it. If you didn't find your drink on the fireplace, don't leave it there. If you're done eating, throw your own trash away. Unless you are at some swank affair with waiters swooping in to take your empties. Doubtful, though. Let's just say I found a cupcake where a cupcake shouldn't be. I'm going to blame it on the kids.
10. A good guest knows when to leave. If the host/ess is blowing out candles and stacking chairs, you should have been gone 20 minutes ago. Unless you are part of the work crew.